Sick City Windows

Capturing New York's sick windows & city happenings

Category: Random

December 4, 2012

Come Again?

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“I can’t even speak right now.” Cara Delevingne

It’s been a really wonky few weeks… I mean I just used the word wonky for fuck sake. Who am I? Who are you? And what the fuck are these?

iPad mini?
Mercedes mini vans?
Electric holiday?
The mustache thing?
Doutzen Kroes’ husband?
Lindsay Lohan’s face?
Lindsay Lohan’s life?
Lindsay Lohan’s death?
Christmas?
New Years?
The Middle East?
Charlie Hunnam?
Heath Ledger’s death?
Your wedding dress?
Babies?
Blogs?
Maccaroons?
Karlie Kloss?

Unclear. That’s what.

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November 20, 2012

On Dying in Public.

“I cried on my 18th birthday.” Liv Tyler

November is always a really weird month for me. On the one hand I get super excited about my birthday. obv. But then I remember– there’s like actually nothing worse than a birthday. Okay aside from not making it to them each year but whatever. Aging is gross. I’m not sure how I got here. I was just 19. But like actually not. Which is scary. And beyond fucked up. What I do know is that I had an amazing deep condition the other day my hair is silken chocolate, I’ve been watching a ton of Teen Wolf, binging on pomegranates and pickles and brunching with my chakra re-alignist. It’s an Atala Rasatala thing. Anyway happy almost Thanksgiving, namaste and wish me luck on the last week of my life –for all of eternity– where I will be closer to my early 20′s than 30′s. I need to go throw up.

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November 12, 2012

The Twenty Six.

“Intimacy is like putting your wiener on a table and having someone say ‘That looks like a penis… only smaller.’” The Love Guru

It’s been forever since I’ve blogged. I’ve been completely uninspired lately– sometimes the wheels of my red r8 creativity just don’t turn… Anyway last year I wrote a list of things I’ve learned over the years and I just came across them, which albeit a little trite, are still relevant so I thought I’d share them:

1. Life is too short to be bundled up for so many months out of the year. Live the eternal summer.
2. Never rush. We are where we are where we are.
3. Wash your hands and NEVER touch your face.
4. Forgive people. And not for them but for you; if not you will always dwell in a house of pain.
5. Communication is everything. We have language for a reason.
6. Hug often.
7. Be open minded. Work to overcome inherent judgementality.
8. Never stop learning, growing, laughing, loving.
9. Value the relationships you make above everything. People are all we have in this life.
10. Peanut butter, raisins and honey are good on just about anything.
11. Work hard, because there isn’t shit else to do. i struggle with this but it sounds good on the list
12. In case of emergency breathe deep. drink fast. or call 911. feel it out.
13. Gaucho pants work on nobody.
14. Balance is subjective.
15. Have an identity outside of your family, friends, work and lovers.
16. Death discriminates against no one.
17. Don’t wait; for people. success. happiness.
18. Calling someone ignorant makes you sound like Michael Jackson. and really fucking ignorant.
19. Have a heart. Stress kills.
20. Don’t stand idly in open doorways, arches, steps and passageways. Move out of the way.
21. Push yourself. But sometimes it’s okay not to eat the coconut scorpion braised Argentinian scaled watersnake.
22. Vacation. In sick locations. locations. locations.
23. Treat. yo. self. and if you’re my family treat me too.
24. Turtlenecks are creepy.
25. Love maddeningly deeply.
26. Legalize it already.

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October 29, 2012

Party Monsters

“If you have a hunchback throw a little glitter on it and go dancing.” James St. James

The thing with clubs is, they can really suck. But the thing with clubs is, they can also be really affecting. Like Saturday night for example- no line, no crowd, so fun. By the looks of it everyone was either at pier 94, or some all white thing. Which if you ask me, will just never be as chic as an all black thing. White makes everything visible. Especially fat. ugly. and pale; the likes of which black would make appear less fat. less ugly. and less pale. But what do I know, I’m just happy concert kids are tired the new club kids. meow.

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October 27, 2012

Halloweiner

“Why are you dressed so scary?” Mean Girls

I feel like every fashion bloggist this year is staging a coup de sluttiness in their Halloween costume guides. Which is some serious tom foolery. I mean everyone knows the only compelling part of Halloween past the age of 13 is the nudity. duh. Last year I was a gold digger, and the year before that a ‘Rock of Love’ contestant. This year I’m a butter face. Cheap dress, garish mask. huge flask. perfection. Happy drinking!

Image courtesy of forbes.com

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October 12, 2012

Bike Babes

“The countenance is the portrait of the soul, and the eyes mark its intentions.” Cicero

Yesterday I went biking with my main boo. also known as my little sister. and bffaeaeaeaeaea. Who’s a younger, tanner, more even toned me. it’s.. so chic I die. She’s super gorg, way funny and the only other person in this world who understands the need for commissioned self portraits everywhere. pillows. walls. towels. lampshades. desks. get into it.

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October 11, 2012

Le Beach House

“There’s only one thing in life, and that’s the continual renewal of inspiration.” Diana Vreeland

On the third Thursday of October every year I host a ceremonial spirit offering to the moon. Diana. And Dionysus. which is set to Beach House. Densely emotive dream pop just right for a ritualistic cleanse. I trek into the forest with roman candles and rosé, in soothsayer moccs, mink and a vintage Elsa Schiaparelli beret, so chic, where I emote and lay to rest the most offensive trend of summer past. This year it’s the flower crown. Gila. xx

Image courtesy of dallasobserver

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October 8, 2012

I’m a Monster!


“For the execution of the voyage, I did not make use of intelligence, mathematics or maps.” Christopher Columbus

Happy Columbus Day my fellow Colombians. Bluths. Americans. A day in which we celebrate the finding of America that was um already found. Anddd inhabited by super fab indigenous peoples. Native American– so chic I die. Kind of like they did. In droves.

Image courtesy of Entertainment.com

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October 7, 2012

Scream Loud Scream Proud

“And I will never, ever respond to anybody – man, woman, vegetable, or mineral – who tells me to keep my mouth shut.” Janice Dickinson

Last week I started primal scream therapy. Which.. is exactly what it sounds like. Therapeutic primal screaming to excise the demons within. And let me just say it’s been fan-fucking-tastic. Once I got past the non-guttural, non-cathartic, high pitched shrilling and fear that someone would call 911 on my war cries– I’ve been unstoppable. I bellow. I roar. I restore. It’s been so successful that not only did I get one of my doormen to join me for a sesh, I’m thinking of organizing locally.. globally.. Team Scream. Scream loud scream proud. xx

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October 3, 2012

And I. E. I.

“I have a whole army of pajamas.” Heidi Klum

So, my birthday is coming up soon and I’ve been thinking that instead of the $2.6million I was going to ask for–I’ll take a bodyguard instead. For one theres nothing more chic than having at all times at least one person in your entourage willing and paid to take a bullet for you. And I mean, someone to hold your handbag– priceless! If I could be hands free eternally– I’d die. In heaven. Chanelo. Handbags are so tired.

Anyway back to my bodyguard, rather than the burley ex-cop/Marine/Hulk ogres every other Heidi starlet orders, I’m going international. As in O-ren Ishii’s Gogo Yubari. Blade swing thing and all. I mean, it’s just so unassuming. And obvi I’ll need to learn Japanese, which is so chic anyway– but like after that it will totally just look like I’m drinking/smoking/shopping/spa’ing with my Asian homie. Which is soooooo much better than psychos knowing I’m protected 24-7. Especially lately, having a cray stalker and all. Who– I’m totally sure at some point is going to come try to skin me and wear me. It’s next level obsesh. Though if it ever happens, you’ll know instantaneously so feel free to attack it liberally…

My birthday is in one month and twenty six days. Parents, you know what to do. Other fam. Friends. Lovers. Followers. I’m registered at CVS. xx. Apparently I’m too old for familial health insurance.

Image courtesy of rumorfix.com

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